And The Stockings Were Hung

And the stockings were (finally) hung. Ella has had a stocking for several weeks now, but Mom and Dad's have been slow in the making. I finally finished my stocking - the final one - at about nine o'clock on Christmas Eve. Just in time for Santa!

All I Want For Christmas

Ella's trip to visit Santa was a successful one. She was a little timid at first, but once she saw the friendly smile, she warmed right up. The candy cane was a good disctraction too.

When Hello Means Goodbye

This could possibly be the hardest thing I have ever done.

On December 5, I joyously went to my OB for a routine prenatal visit. It was the day that Landon and I planned to send out good tidings of great joy to all our family and friends. We were having a baby! My visit did not go as planned. After a long consultation, it was discovered that our little baby no longer had a heartbeat and had stopped growing a few weeks earlier. I should have been just more than 13 weeks along, but our little baby had stopped growing at about 11 weeks. I had no idea that this had happened; in fact, I thought I might have been feeling a few little flutters of movement. Clearly, that was not the case.

After the discovery was made, I did a lot of crying. It was at this time my physician came in to discuss a D&C. I was to far along and the risk of bleeding was to great to consider a miscarriage. I was in no frame of mind to be making such a decision, but I knew that they had to give me all the information. I just sat there with my tears of sorrow and Kleenex as she discussed the procedure. I needed to be with Landon and Ella.

On December 7, Landon and I spent the day at the hospital. It was a very emotional day. I know Landon and I grew even closer as a couple as we endured this and I am very thankful for such a wonderful husband. My physician was also very compassionate. Despite her busy day, she took the time to bring in an ultrasound machine so that Landon and I could take one last look at our precious baby and say goodbye.

As we wait for the final results of all the pathology and genetic testing, we have had time to reflect on many things. I know I am even more grateful for the beautiful, healthy little girl that we have have already been blessed with. Ella is an absolute joy. I also believe that even though it has been hard to have this happen at Christmas-time, it has been a blessing. I am grateful for the gift our Savior has given us: The gift of eternal life. I know that we are an eternal family and that our Heavenly Father loves us. He has a plan for all of us.

Da Num-Num

Ella has always been original with her use of her binky (a.k.a. num-num). She completely wraps her lower lip around the choke-guard. Here is a picture of her doing just that back when she was about 9 months old. She also has to sleep with several binky's in her bed. She likes to rotate the binky she is sucking on periodically, and it probably makes it easier to find one in her sleep when there are several there. Tonight, again, she set another record. Landon was rocking Ella before bedtime, as is our routine, and this is how she felt most comfortable. What a girl.

November 14, 2006

December 3, 2007